there’s like 10,0000,0 accounts with names like “Best Heritage Posts” and “Tumblr Hall Of Fame Posts” and “So Funny Hellsite Posts” but where’s the shitty posts accounts. where’s the hall of fail accounts. i want to see the worst of the worst
I want an ice maker and enough room in the freezer for a pizza and that is IT.
I want the dumbest fridge you got. Gimme the orange tabby of refrigeration. I want my fridge to pull the wrong lever and turn my enemies into llamas instead of killing them. I want the following features: keeps things cold, has compartment that keeps things colder, a door that opens and shuts.
“Here at Stupid Jeff’s Dumb Appliance Warehouse we sell the dumbest fucking appliances. Check out this fridge. This fridge won’t ask you about your day, this dumb fucking fridge doesn’t know what an Elon Musk is and won’t fucking tell you what bullshit that dumb monkey is slapping into his phone today when you try to get some fucking milk. We took out all those "smart” electronics and in their place we put a loaded Glock 9mm that is put right up to that light that turns on when you open the door, which is the smartest thing in this fucking stupid fridge and let me tell you that fucker is on thin goddamn ice, if it gets too smart and tries to turn on before you open that door, the Glock will blow it to hell. Speaking of ice, this stupid fridge makes it. It makes ice, it keeps things cold, it comes with shelves. It’s sturdy enough that when your ex comes back to your place looking for their stuff that they think they left behind like nine months ago and they know that you don’t have it, but they wanted an excuse to come start a fight with you and throw a chair at your head but miss you and hit your fridge MICHAEL, this fridge will keep trucking because it gives zero shits and it only lives to keep things cold. Come to Stupid Jeff’s Dumb Appliance Warehouse, if you ask us if we have an app, we break your kneecaps.“
It drives me insane how many people dont realise how often they break the law and that if the full force of it was ever applied life would basically be unliveable. Like between traffic violations, petty workplace theft, account sharing and piracy alongside how common it is to have been in posession of some illegal drug at some point in your life. People still manage to get away with thinking “criminals” are people who commit crimes not just populations that are surveilled enough to be routinely prosecuted
no but it’s the way for aziraphale “nothing lasts forever” meant “i’m willing to give up the bookshop if it means i can be with you safely” and for crowley it meant “nothing lasts forever, not the bookshop, not earth, not us”
and and and
I fully believe that when Crowley says ‘you can’t leave this bookshop’, he isn’t actually talking about the bloody bookshop
I can’t stop thinking about this tiktok i saw of a girl who was an extra in the good omens s2 bar scene and at one point david tennant just SMASHED into a wall and she was like omg are you alright and he said yeah he could just barely see with the snake eye contact lenses and the sunglasses and now i think about it every time i rewatch the confession scene like man walked off turned back around and pin-the-tail-on-the-donkeyed michael sheen’s pursed lips
I cannot just #prev tag this, @virgo-79 is right and everyone should see it
Sorry I know this is like the sixth reblog today and it’s almost midnight and the poll is almost finished but guys guys i just realized today is literally black cat appreciation day!
Meow reminds you that there is only one correct response.
The urge to drop everything and everyone, get a ticket and fly somewhere far away and find a small town where no one knows you and get some small menial job and lodgings and cut your hair and change your name and be alone and read the paper and ride a bike every day and eat bread, get called the village weirdo and adopt a weird stray dog that smells bad and have a flip phone and occasionally buy a hardcover book and write a tender but ominous note and send it to someone from you old life to let them know your ok and the get bored and come back to your old life after 16 months like nothing happened and gaslight everyone who asks you where you went.
